Proud of Motherhood

From Denis:
“Yesterday I was reading a book about pregnancy and being a mother in the western world, and it talked a lot about how mothers are taught to be ashamed of how baby-centred they are, everyone thinks of it condescendingly, and mothers apologise for it, like its a weakness.

do it without apologising!!! what else are you going to blog about - the fuckin weather?? you just gave birth!! you're the DUDE!”

I guess women are made feel ashamed or at least defensive about many of their childrearing decisions – having no children, having too many children, having an only child without siblings, bottlefeeding, breastfeeding for too long, staying at home, going back to work, worrying too much about their children, not giving enough attention to them, etc. On the side note, I wonder if the fathers feel judge on any of their decisions? Or are most decisions and therefore the responsibility for them still left up-to the mothers?

I’m not sure if I was being apologetic, my intention was to state the purpose of this blog so people can decide if they want to be part of target audience. There are many people, who want to hear minute details about her life. But there are others, who are in totally different space at this time and all the baby info is just not relevant to their lives and therefore not so interesting.

I am happy and proud to f be her mother (It feels like anyone who knows me even the tiny bit knew that I’ll love the motherhood). She is so glorious and magical, like all babies are. At the moment she needs me to be centred on her, she needs me to care for her for many hours of the day. And I’m happy to do so. I wanted to have kids for ages and in a way this is the perfect time. While I love my job, it was going nowhere for the last year and was getting drag with day-after-day predictability. It’s great to have time off to think about different directions I may take in my career and personal life, to do something totally different for awhile, to experience something new and therefore to grow as a person. And it sounds like there are few changes happening at work, so there is high possibility I’ll have few interesting career options on my return to work in one year.

Since I have no previous baby experience there are a lot of learning to do and many difficult moments. I can see how easy it is to develop postnatal depression. So thank you again everyone for your support, kind words, excitement about Cat, presents, emails, questions, desire to meet her in person.