Lovely book

Work is love made visible.
And if you cannot work with love but only with distaste, it is better that you should leave your work and sit at the gate of the temple and take alms of those who work with joy.
Kahlil Gibran "The Prophet"

The Prophet is a wonderful book full of beauty and wisdom. Nearly every line is a quote and speaks to my mind, heart and soul. I recently got a collection of Kahlil Gibran’s other works and looking forward to reading it. Hope your life is full of lovely books and wise words.

Pink

I picked up some knitting wool at the local charity shop – totally an impulse buy: it was cheap, I needed something to crochet with, but it was pink. Since I don’t really like pink (except the very pale kind) I stared at the three balls of wool for two weeks wondering what possessed me to buy them in the first place and what I’m going to do with them. And then I added some purple thread, found the fattest hook I have (think it’s 6mm) and using simple treble crossed stitches made myself a scarf. It was great for practicing the turning chain (it finally makes sense after years of crocheting and eventually reading the instructions in TWO books) and keeping the tension even (still not so good at it).

While making it I gradually grew to like the scarf and think it will work well with a simple black coat with a straight collar. Now I just have to find the said simple black coat – this is one of the top reasons why I hate shopping, I decide beforehand exactly what I want and then struggle to find it. But my best ever shopping buddy (hi mum!) is coming to London soon, so I’m looking forward to hitting the shops with her.

Maybe I’ll make myself more scarves as all the ones I have are in various shades of green and blue. Staring at our white walls and neutral IKEA furniture (flats in London mostly come furnished) I realised that I want more colour in my life.

Beauty on the gloomy day

Since the sky was gloomy with clouds again and I’m weary of getting wet on our daily walks to the park, we hopped on the Tube and went into town to see Jerwood Applied Arts Prize 2007: Jewellery exhibition. It is a very small exhibit – two rooms of works by 6 artists. But I still managed to spend 40 minutes in there marvelling at the imagination, craftsmanship and beauty of each item on display (the maker’s profile pages have some pictures of the work). I loved the airiness and muted colour combinations of Yoka Izawa’s work and elegance of Susan Cross' metal weaves. The exhibition is in London until 22nd of July and it is right next to the Tate Modern, so you can always pop in there afterwards, if you want to extend your cultural outing.

We on the other hand went right past Tate Modern to see the man, who we can never get enough of.

Paul, French bakery, opened a shop next to St. Paul’s Catherdral. So my dear husband treated me to a lovely lunch and I got to take home this beauty to prolong the pleasure.

Is summer back?

While it was raining outside, we enjoyed watching Wimbledon on TV.


Now that the tennis is over the weather seems to be improving, so hopefully we'll be able to enjoy some sunshine.

Creative women

Our real illiteracy is our inability to create.
Hundertwasser

Another reason for less blogging is that I’m trying to reduce the time I spend on the Internet. Reading blogs is tremendously addictive, especially when there are so many creative women around: the ones who are able put their feelings into beautiful words, the ones who can create such cuteness out of a simple sock, the ones who create their own jewellery and the ones who find some free time in their busy lives to create beautiful spaces for their kids.

The wheels are in motion

I usually fall silent in my blog due to:
a) lack of sleep
b) shortage of coherent thoughts (often as the result of a)
c) too many thoughts swarming in my head

Recently it’s been the last one. I started the negotiations to arrange my return from maternity leave, starting with working on part-time bases (about 20 hours/week) from home. And I’m full of conflicting thoughts and emotions since the questions of returning to the office and to the fulltime work were already asked. There are so many ifs.

I look at how little time my husband has to spend with Cat and I know that I’m not going to be comfortable with seeing my daughter only for 30 minutes in the morning, 30 in the evening and two weekend days. The best moments I have with her are the ones when I don’t feel any pressure to get other things done and have plenty of time to be silly and relaxed. The other day I spent ages trying to get her to smile (think she is teething again) and just as I gave up she looked at me, squashed her slimy hand into my face and started laughing. As the MasterCard ad says – priceless. I want my days to be full of moments like that. I don’t want to pay someone else most of my salary to experience that joy instead of me.

At the same time I know that the longer the break the harder it will be to get interesting work. After working really hard for the last few years, it seems unfair to have to start from the beginning again in few years time.

Maybe the decision would be easier if I didn’t like my company and the people I work with. Or if I didn’t have good career opportunities in my current job available NOW. Or if I knew that I would be able to return to the same level after 2-3 years break. Or if doing plenty of unpaid overtime wasn’t the norm. Or if I didn’t love being able to spend some of the daylight hours outside (it gets dark at 4pm here!) Or if I didn’t enjoy having a reasonably clean house and nice home cooked dinners and baking and having time for myself to read, crochet or just stare into space. Or if there were relatives and friends who could help to take care of Cat.

Or maybe it wouldn’t be any easier. Maybe any decision will be a temporary compromise to be constantly rethought and re-evaluated while I try to figure out my own life values and how they fit together. Fitting them all together seems to be the hard part.

P.S. If everything goes well I’ll be starting parttime work from home on 13th of August.

The small things

I love good haircuts. Without having a good hairdresser (oh how I miss my brilliant Australian one!) I go through cycles of letting my hair get very long, dream and debate about what haircut and where I should get, finally (after lots of talking) book the hairdressers appointment and get it cut as short as my comfort zone allows me. Yesterday I came out of the hair salon feeling lighter and happier. My hair bounces up and down, I swish it around to enjoy that nice feeling of short hair against my neck and cheeks, I marvel at how much short hair makes me look like my mum. But best of all I feel so upbeat and confident – anything and everything seems possible and doable. Hurray to the small things in life, which make us happy.