Thank you to my parents

Do you ever wish you could go back to your childhood room and take a slow look around at, let’s say, age five, seven, or fifteen? ...
In order to preserve in my mind some of my favorite spots and the flood of memories I treasure with them, I now try to take photographs of those spaces from time to time while we’re still really living in them.
Amanda Blake Soule “The Creative Family”

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When I read these lines in Amanda’s book I started thinking about my own childhood and the room in which I spent most of it. There are some things I remember well, like the bunk bed my dad made for my sister and I out of their old bed; but there are plenty more memories that are hovering on the edge of my visual eye, fleeing just as I’m about to see them clearly. Then again sometimes a memory jumps out and I’m surprised that I could ever forget the colour, the smell, the item or the event it summons.

With my dad, originally uploaded by Fioleta.

Thinking back to our tiny two rooms flat, I unexpectedly remembered that at some stage we had a swing hanging in one of the doorways. And this memory made me think of all the things my parents did with the limited resources at hand to enrich our lives: we always had access to various magazines (DYI, art, travel) and books; they were happy to buy us craft and art supplies; my mum had patience enough to teach us to crochet and to knit (I’m not sure why I never picked up the second one until now); she knitted us beautiful items of clothes that I still remember while most of the store-bought once disappeared from my memory forever; they took us on the trips to Black Sea, Moscow and St Petersburg; they borrowed money of everyone they knew (bank loans didn’t really exist in Soviet Russia) and bought a summer house next to river Don.

With my mum, originally uploaded by Fioleta.

I suspect that my parents would say that they did many creative things out of necessity, but they must’ve enjoyed them as well as they managed to share the enjoyment of gardening, cooking, fishing, making things with me. The hard task of being a parent is often under-appreciated, but since becoming one myself I feel the need to thank my parents for being decent, hard-working, fun, caring and loving people.

My dear parents, I’m proud to be your daughter. Thank you for every day you've been my parents.

Discovering the world: sand and sea

While in Odessa The Little Girl got to experience walking and playing in the sand for the first time. At first she totally didn’t like the feel of the sand and tried really hard to avoid standing on it. Every time I would try to put her down she would cling to me with all her strength and lift her legs up as high as she could. However, when I put her down on our beach blanket she was happy to grab handfuls of sand, let it go and see the grains fall down. Soon the blanket was covered with the sand and the Little Girl finally braved walking on it to try to get to someone’s beach ball (she loves playing with the balls at the moment). Later Clive and she built a sandcastle and she was perfectly happy to crawl all over it.

She was slightly unsure about the sea water at first as well, but warmed up to it very quickly (I wish the water would warm up to us as it was very cold). She enjoyed walking in and out of the water, looking at the tiny waves, searching for the wet stones (collecting stones is another recent love) and even managed to fall face down into the water ones. Somehow I find it sad that she didn’t get to walk or play in the sand earlier. I noticed that all the kids playgrounds I saw in Russia had sandy surface unlike the asphalt one of England – the sand probably has it’s on downsides, but I think I would prefer it to the hard grey asphalt.


The photo above was taken by my husband using his "new" (at least to him) Mamiya camera.

Japan: family, craft, etc

It is past 10 o'clock, in the few hours we have to get up at 3am to fly to Odessa and I still haven’t finished writing about Japan, so here are some quick bullet points:

• The Japanese side of the family were very hospitable, took us on the car trip to the Kairaku-en park (one of three biggest parks in Japan), gave us presents, enjoyed playing with The Little Girl, worried about us being too cold, etc. But again the language was major barrier. I wish I could communicate my gratitude for all their generosity and kindness, so I want to send them a small present – I just need to figure out what type of English things someone from Japan may enjoy.
• It was very interesting to meet few more members of Clive’s family as until now I only met his dad, who came to visit us last year. Cheryl, the mother of the bride, used to be a computer programmer when punch-cards were in use, but now she makes beautiful miniature porcelain dolls. Luckily for me she made one for a Japanese friends and I got to see it – the level of detail and workmanship are impressive. You can see for yourself at her Miniature Porcelain dolls from Africa website.
  
• I’m glad we stayed in the small town with fewer tourist attractions, as we didn’t feel the need to rush around trying to get to see everything. Instead we could take time to pause in the small temples and enjoy sunshine in the Hachimanyama Park.
• At the same time we had an option of catching the train to other towns, while we choose not to go to Tokyo we did make it to Nikko to marvel at the beautiful architecture.
  
• Totally accidentally I managed to visit a craft store: in the shopping complex, planning to go down, we got into the lift with an old woman; she pressed the button for one of the upper floors; and once there, at least according to my husband, it took me only a second to realize what I was seeing and forget about everything else in the world. After tiny London craft shops this one looked heavenly huge, but sadly I couldn't buy everything I liked or needed.
• The wedding was held at the beautiful park and both bride and groom looked fantastic. I enjoyed both the wedding and the reception and here is a photo of me in the park before the wedding.

As always more photos can be seen on Flickr.

The sorrow of my joy

When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
Kahlil Gibran The Prophet

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My baby sister arrived today. She changed in the past year: somehow she is cooler, funkier, more confident, more beautiful and all grown-up. And I only have one tiny week to enjoy and to get accustomed to her newness.

How did this post become about sleep?

The weather this weekend was totally unlike previous one.

When I came to England many people asked me if I was missing Australian weather. And the answer always was no. Melbourne weather is very similar to London - warm and sunny one day, cold and rainy the next. Except in Melbourne it doesn’t change from day to day, it changes from hour to hour. One of Melbournians’ favourite sayings is “Melbourne is the city of 4 seasons in one day”. I’m actually one of those rare people who like London weather (most of the time) as I don’t handle hot weather very well.

My father-in-law is visiting for two weeks so we took him to Geffrye museum on Sunday. It is a lovely museum of English domestic interior and furniture. Friendly staff, stair-free access, highchairs in the cafe and its small size (1-2 hours are enough to see all of it) make this museum a perfect place for visiting with a baby. Their front lawn is wonderful for relaxing on a warm day. Oh, and the entrance to the museum is free.

Today we went to the National Art Gallery. Luckily Noel was happy to see only part of the collection as Cat wasn’t impressed by Art and only lasted about an hour before needing a change of scenery. So after observing the tourists and pigeons at the Trafalgar Square we went back home for a nice long afternoon nap. After all the complaining I did about Cat’s sleeping habits, I have to admit that I got to the stage where I sleep better in the afternoon next to her than at night. Sleeping through the night is becoming a very distant unreal memory as I certainly had to wake up few times at night during the last stages of my pregnancy to go to the bathroom. I’m struggling to remember how it feels to sleep for a long stretch of time since I never really paid very much attention to sleeping – I just slept. So my dear childless friends please savour the tiny miracle of uninterrupted sleep!

Brit in the family

Cat’s new shinny microchiped British passport arrived on Friday with a baby picture, which doesn’t even look like her anymore. British Citizen! I never thought that my first child will be a British citizen, born in London right next to the Paddington station. Will she find it amusing that I never even heard of Paddington Bear until the end of 2004?

I’m still occasionally astounded by the fact that I am someone’s mother. My life before Cat seems very distant and my current life doesn’t yet feel like it is fully mine. I wonder when the sense of being magically transported into the middle of someone else’s life will go away? While I’m struggling to recognize it as my own, I marvel at how perfectly this life fits me. Clive and I settled into very peaceful, comfortable and supportive relationship. And Cat helps us to recognise the important things in life and I believe helps us to appreciate each other more. I always thought that I’ll have two sons followed by a daughter until I got pregnant. And when that certainty went away and I knew that I’ll have a daughter. Based on my relationship with my mum, which wasn’t always easy, there are some character qualities; like seriousness, stubbornness and independence of thought; that I dreaded in my future daughter. But in last few years, as our relationship matured and we learned to respect each other as adults, I accepted that my mum was and always will be my biggest and most respected role model. We are very similar and I’m proud (and happy) to be like her. And while people argue about who Cat looks like, I am and will be glad to see glimpses of us all in her. I’m joyful she is here to cement our family bonds by her similarities and to expand our world views by her differences.

Three months

Catherine is three months today. We celebrated a bit early by having an Autumn Apple Sponge Cake on Saturday before Clive went to the airport. The cake was delicious, the lemon reduced the sweetness making it perfect in my books (I’m not a big fan of super sweet). And Catherine was awake to witness its creation and disappearance. She is spending more and more time awake and more aware of her surroundings. Nowadays she almost never cries. The other day I was surprised to notice that her hands are bigger and while packing away her newborn clothes I couldn’t actually believe that she really was that small. The speed of babies development is incredible and I feel that I have to stay flexible to keep up with her.

There aren’t going to be any new photos this week as Clive took my camera with him to Hong Kong. But tomorrow I'll visit Baby Clinic to find out Cat's current weight.

I must be becoming extremely sentimental in my old age as I really miss Clive after only 2 days. I miss our evening chats. I miss seeing him getting Cat to smile at the end of the day – after spending all day together she isn’t as willing to smile at me and I’m not as eager to find new ways to amuse her. I miss us laughing at each other and ourselves. I miss his support and understanding, which isn’t always (and doesn’t have to be) expressed in words. I even miss the comfort of his presence in the same room while we do our separate things. I miss being able to give him a hug or just touch his hand in passing. Only 4 more days.

Happy Valentines Day

I lost my wedding ring today. Grr! On Valentines Day! Since I lost weight it was loose for awhile and I should’ve been more careful. I’m pretty sure it is somewhere in the flat, so will do a big search tomorrow (can clean the place at the same time, it really needs a good clean).

Anya departed to Berlin yesterday. Catherine and I had great time with her. I can be totally silly with her and ended giggling and laughing a lot. I noticed that I very rarely laugh in London – everything just seems bleaker, greyer, more stressful and less amusing that it does in Melbourne. I wish she could stay for longer.

Cat woke up at 4am and slept less than usual during the day. Tonight I want to curl up next to my husband on the couch and have a nice long chat. But tomorrow Clive is working until very late, so I think I’ll go to bed at the same time as Cat (around 7:30-8:00pm) to try to catch up on sleep.

I almost ended up feeling miserable today, but Clive got me a bouquet of lovely tulips (my favourite flowers) and now I can’t stop smiling.

Happy Valentines Day to everyone. I hope you have someone next to you; who loves, respects and cherishes you.

Meeting the aunt

My sister, Anya, arrived on Sunday from Australia with more cute clothes and books for the baby. Their meeting went really well and she managed to get plenty of smiles out of Cat. I think the baby is enjoying having another person to entertain her during the day. I wonder if she sees us as big toys.

Having Anya here is a good excuse to have lots of chocolate, biscuits and tea. Another good reason for having lots of tea with honey is that I have a cold and physically feel pretty miserable. Since last two days were very sunny we went for the long walks in the park and I took lots of good photos of Cat (sunshine is so much better for that than the electric lights).

Catherine is getting much better at controlling her hands. Now her thumb usually finds her month, though sometimes she still hits her nose and then slowly slides her hand down to her mouth. Yes, now she sucks on her thumb instead the whole fist. She often manages to hit hanging toys and today she lifted and moved one of her toys (sadly I didn’t have my camera ready and once I got it Cat was more interested in looking at me than moving toys around).

Spoiled by presents

Polina and Jack arrived safely from Berlin on Thursday night. They had a quick peek at the sleeping beauty, before retiring to bed as well. They were lucky - Cat slept really well and the rest of us got plenty of sleep too. On Friday morning we had peaceful breakfast together before Catherine woke up. Polina is all ecstatic about her new niece and is taking million photos. Jack is great at holding Cat on his shoulder (her favourite position), she kept on borrowing her face into his neck, looking very snug, warm and cute.

Our pram arrived in the afternoon and Clive had fun assembling it in the evening. Big thank you to Laura and the rest of South African crew for getting it for Cat. PJs choose this moment to give us presents from them, my parents & Polina’s parents. Last two months were full of gifts and there is no end in sight, I feel spoiled and loved. And Cat would certainly feel the same way if she could comprehend how much attention and love is showered on her by everyone.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas Everyone!

I can’t believe it is Xmas day already. Catholic Xmas always catches me by surprise. When I think it is still two months away, there is only one month. When I think it’s still one month away, it is only 1-2 weeks away. And when I think I still have a week, it’s already here. I guess I’m just in denial that another year is about to end and for me Catholic Xmas is the first marker of its end.

Naree & Vihn came for a visit in the afternoon (sadly it gets dark by about 4pm) and brought more presents for our cute baby girl.